Apart from choosing a perfect prom dress, the moment they get asked to prom is probably one of the most significant moments girls think about leading up to that big night. Unfortunately, getting invited to prom doesn’t always mean it will be prince charming doing the asking. If you’ve been asked to attend the big dance by a guy who’s not your ideal date, or someone you’re just not attracted to, don’t feel obligated to say yes.
Being asked to prom doesn’t mean you have to go with the person doing the asking, but we also understand how incredibly hard it can be to turn someone down. This is why it’s important to be prepared with kind and polite ways to let someone down easy so that you don’t unnecessarily hurt someone’s feelings or burn any bridges. Remember, it was hard for them to get up the gumption to ask as well!
So if someone asks you to prom that you just can’t picture yourself spending the night with, try one of these gentle ways to let them down:
1. Offer some uncertainty
If it isn’t confirmed yet that you’ll be attending prom and he hasn’t just walked in on you fawning over long or short prom dresses with your friends, mention to him that you are uncertain if you’ll even be attending prom. Add that, if you do go, that you would love to grab a photo with him to have a memory of your friendship.
2. Say that you’re going as a group
Assure him that you’re flattered that he’s asked, but that you’re actually making prom a girls’ night and going with a group of friends instead. Promise to save him a dance on the night of to lessen the blow. If you are going with a group of friends, get your ladies together one evening to peruse some online stores, like JJ’s House, to see if there any matching dresses you may want to wear together.
3. Tell him you’re planning on asking someone else
This one can be harder, but it’s important to be honest so as not to give him false hope. If you are planning on going with someone else, ease his embarrassment by letting him know that you are actually planning on asking someone else to go with you. Make it clear that you really like the other guy you’re asking, or you would have been honored to go with him. This could also give you the push you need to actually ask out your dream date.
4. Be direct
Sometimes it’s best to be straightforward to make sure there isn’t any confusion or hard feelings. Little white lies may seem harmless but could end up actually crushing their feelings if they realize you fibbed about not going, or only going with friends. In this instance, it’s best to be straightforward and simply say: “I appreciate you asking, but I already have other plans.”
If the two of you are friendly, offer to meet up after prom at a party, or offer to save them a dance.